...is exactly how I've felt this week. The kids have been miserable and bickering with one another non-stop. The rain didn't help. Thank goodness yesterday and today were a bit nicer.
In between early mornings, restless sleepers and a midnight trip to emerg with a croupy monkey, I've been feeling worn out. I've been tired and cranky which turns into lazy! So my house was a disaster too... I know I should be positive and look at all the things I can be grateful for but it's been difficult to see the bright side of things the last few days.
I need to remember to cast my cares, stop worrying and follow peace. To lean on others and not feel guilty when I need a break. I've never been good with changes and decisions (as much as I can get quite excited about them!) Here is what's been niggling at my brain this week:
* Justin... is sick again. This kid doesn't seem to stay away from the sniffles for longer than a week. As mentioned before, we (read: I) ended up taking him to emerg one night because he woke up wheezing and barking (and then screaming in pain) so badly. We were fortunate to be seen within 15 minutes of arriving (never happens here!) and then sat through 2 hours of treatment. The respiratory therapist was great (made a game out of the mask and said Justin was a dragon). Keep praying that he gets (and stays) well, please. He needs his strength and has a hard time fighting things off.
** We are now down to one car. Kev's lease was returned and he'll be driving "my" car into work. This is a good thing (I think) but it will be an adjustment. I'm a little worried I might start to go stir-crazy being housebound. Yes, I know we can walk...but it's B'ville. Really, what's there to walk too? I was (see next paragraph) limited to one or two days a week running errands before... but I took advantage of those days when I didn't have daytime daycare placements to go out and about. Doing groceries, meeting friends for lunch, hitting the library, etc. were all done on Wednesdays or Fridays and left weeknights free to just hang out at home. On a positive side, we'll be saving a bit of money!
*** I am down two daycare kids as of last week. Their mom is on mat leave and while we're excited for their family and soon-to-arrive baby, I don't have a clue what to do myself. This family was a big chunk of my income but with summer right around the corner and only having 2 kids on a part-time basis for those 8-9 weeks, I'm not sure whether I should advertise for more summer placements (good money but long weeks!) or hold-off until the next school year starts and keep it strictly before-and-after. To wait until September will mean a few really lean months but a lot less stress... gah, I hate decisions! It also affects any vacation plans we may have had (see next paragraph.)
**** Our summer vacation plans have gone out the window as of yesterday due to funds needed elsewhere. We weren't going to do anything truly exciting but I was going to take at least 2 weeks off and Kev at least one. We weren't sure whether we were going to stick around home, road trip, camping or what, but it was in the works. Now we're replacing carpets on the main floor. Diesel had a vicious encounter with the existing carpet and underpad. We're missing chunks of both and the carpet was torn all the way back a couple feet and now has an ugly (noticeable) split in it. We were planning on replacing it eventually... but that was projected for at least another 2 years. Maybe we can camp out on the new hardwood.
***** Why are there so many freakin' hardwood options out there? I know I don't want anything too dark, but we brought home some samples and I don't think I want anything too light either. I don't have an eye for decor either so the whole fact that we have very light kitchen cupboards throws me for a loop. I have a few top runners but my reasons why they've made the cut are very varied and include eco-friendliness (bamboo), grain (maple/oak), as well as pricing/financing options. On the bright side, Kev will take some time off and we'll work on this project weekends and while kids are in school.... and paint my walls! (So not only do I have to make a decision on hardwood but I have to pick out paint colours, too?!?)
*Sigh* I know that was a long, not-very-positive reflection... but I'm hoping this week will resolve alot of my concerns and maybe have some happier, sunnier days.
(PS - anyone have any good venue ideas for a 3rd birthday in the beginning of May??? I'm hoping for sunny, warm weather and maybe we can do a picnic in the park...but last year was cold and drizzly!)